Thursday, March 3, 2011

Signs ch1: Those Smiling Eyes

Chapter 1: Those Smiling Eyes


Singing has been the thing Agnes like the best ever since she was born. She is a singer now, famous and respected as a talented one. Her career is good, her albums and singles were sold above 500,000 copies in average—except her last mini-album. It was released six months ago and sold around 200,000 copies. Truthfully, it was good enough for singers at her age. However, David, her manager who’s also her elder brother, didn’t think so. The market was more into bands, he thought, and he came to conclusion that she needed some breakthrough.


An invitation for Agnes to sing in Asia Song Festival that was held in Korea was the beginning of his plan on her breakthrough. Somehow, he assigned her to a well-known major agency, JYPE, to get special training. So there she is, working out her body to satisfy her manager’s ambition—and hers, in fact. The switching from somebody in her country to nobody in this country wasn’t easy, but she had never complained about it.


Being trained for almost half a year, she got used to her new life well. Breakfast - singing practice - dancing practice – lunch - language course - dancing practice - singing practice – dinner – singing practice was her usual routine. With that schedule, how could she visit Bishounen Café so often? Well, if you had an assistant named Aryani Sutowo, it would be very much possible.


Aya, that’s how she is called, was an old friend of Agnes back then. She has been a regular visitor to Bishounen Café since her family moved to Korea when she was in Middle High and was crazy about its sweets. The fact that it’s located only 500 m away from the agency building gave her reason to drag Agnes to Bishounen Café every time she had chance, like this time.


“Welcome-“


“Yo! Chans, how are you?” Aya cut him off. Side by side with Chansung, she walked to a table near the garden. Agnes followed them quietly. Not long after the two sat, another waiter popped up to greet Aya.


“Where have you been? You haven’t visited us for a long time.” He stood by the table.


“Don’t exaggerate, Junho! It’s just a week!”


Agnes knew Aya made friends with all waiters and chefs and even the manager of the café. All those good-looking waiters treated her as if she’s one of them. However, Agnes noticed someone’s gaze upon Aya was more than that. His smiling eyes said his feelings and it’s slightly clear to read that for him, Aya was a princess. It’s a big lie if Agnes said she’s not bothered by it—since she’s used to be the princess for everyone back then. Yet her manager’s big plan and her tight schedule—and her haughtiness—made her put it aside.


Jinwoon, the waiter with those smiling eyes joined their table a moment later. It wasn’t the time to eat nor have tea so there were only a few people in the café and the waiters could have short break. “So, what you two are doing now?” he asked.


“Basically, I help her doing things as usual.” Aya sipped her drink. “She’s flying home tomorrow to do photo shoot and performance, right Nez?”


Agnes nodded.


“Ah, that means you’re going to miss Bishounen Band’s performance again, Aya?” Yong asked. “You know, Jinwoon will be the main vocal in the next performance.” He added.


“EH? Really? You’re main vocal, Jinwoon?” Aya shocked and got excited. Jinwoon smiled widely. Her eyes widened. “I will not miss it!” she exclaimed.


Jinwoon raised his eyebrow. “You said Agnes will fly home.”


“She is, but I’m not.”


Agnes could see sparkle on his eyes when Aya said she’s not flying home with Agnes. 'Crap that smiling eyes!'


----

Love in the Ice

The weather was hot. I went to the nearest cold beverages machine. I got two cans as Changmin wanted one. Then I saw him.

He’s walking to the machine too. I examined his figure. He gained more weight.

He froze ten steps away from me.

His player yet warm look then removed by an awkward one. I swore, our fans would still be swooned even with that face.

I didn’t expect to meet him here. I knew he’s in Korea to film, but I didn’t know the set was around here. We’ve never been able to wander around without guards even with disguise--or are they able now?

None of us said a word. We were in awkward silence until Changmin came whining.

“Hyung, where’s my--“ he also frozed seeing him. “Yoochun hyung…” he said faintly.

“Oraenmanieyo.” Yoochun bowed slightly.

Changmin and I bowed back. “Oraenmanieyo.”

We haven’t seen each others for months and all we said was only ‘long time no see’. One could tell how much I wanted those precious times back.

-------------------------------

Oh yeah, I know this theme is sensitive.

How I Become A Key

Kekekeke~ silakan ketawa kalo merasa drabble ini lucu, tapi kalo nggak lucu mohon jangan tabok saya #hidesbehindKey

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"Why did you vote for Jinwoon instead of me? His rap isn't even nearing me and he can't dance at all! Are you MY friend or HIS friend? Do you find him charming?"

She only rolled her eyes.

"Why didn't you give your vote to me? You know how much I dreamed to be school representative at this?"

"I know Kim Kibum, you told me a thousand times."

"Then WHY?"

"Because you can't join that competition."

"WHY?"

"Because you'll have been busy doing exhausting training in SM Entertainment by the time the competition held."

"W-what?"

"They sent the letter of acceptance this morning. I took it from your mailbox, sorry... I was checking your newspaper as usual when I waited for you coming out of the house then I found it and I wanted to suprise you."

"I... I... Oh my goodness, thank you God!"

"I hope you won't forget me once you become famous celebrity."

"Of course I won't!"

"And Kibum, I've created a stage name for you."

"What is it?"

"KEY."

"Key?"

"Yes, Key."

"Why Key?"

"Because you are the Key to my heart."



--------------------------------------------

This is supposed to be cheesy, so don't throw up, please :D

Lean on Me

Aku mendorong pintu kamar sedikit.

Seperti yang sudah kuduga, Shiwon sedang bekerja di tempat tidur. Ia berkutat dengan laptop di pangkuannya. Beberapa kali ia membetulkan letak kacamatanya yang turun.

Aku memandanginya lekat.

Shiwon adalah orang yang luar biasa sibuk. Ia bekerja sepanjang hari dan masih harus melanjutkan pekerjaannya di rumah. Ia pergi ke kantor pagi-pagi setelah menurunkanku di kos Lolli-chan. Meskipun ia selalu tiba di rumah lebih dulu dariku, tetapi ia harus berjibaku dengan ganasnya jalan raya dan macet yang menguras tenaga. Pekerjaannya memang hanya di dalam ruangan saja dan tampak tidak membutuhkan banyak tenaga, tetapi aku tahu ia harus memutar otak lebih keras dari orang-orang lain di kantornya.

Dengan semua keadaan itu, Shiwon masih bisa tersenyum setiap kali aku memanggilnya. Ia berusaha untuk mendengar cerita dan keluhanku dengan penuh perhatian. Sekuat tenaga ia menahan diri agar tidak menguap di hadapanku walaupun aku bisa dengan jelas melihat kelelahan tergambar di wajahnya. Jika ia benar-benar tidak kuat menahan kantuk, ia akan meminta maaf lalu membiarkanku melanjutkan cerita sementara ia tertidur di bahuku.

Dan lihatlah aku sekarang.

Shiwon tak pernah sekalipun mengeluh atas banyaknya pekerjaan yang harus ia selesaikan atau betapa menyebalkan bos dan koleganya. Aku? Baru menghadapi orang-orang banyak tingkah itu saja aku sudah disorientasi. Baru menghadapi tugas beruntun dan keharusan berpartisipasi dalam sekian banyak kegiatan itu saja aku sudah patah arang. Baru menghadapi tekanan sebesar itu saja aku sudah sangat ingin kembali ke zona nyamanku.

Aku memandangi Shiwon dengan nanar. Perasaanku campur aduk.

Shiwon berhenti menatap layar laptopnya dan menoleh kepadaku. Secara otomatis ia mengembangkan senyum lembutnya.

Aku tidak bisa lagi menahan emosiku. Mataku mulai berkabut.

Shiwon meletakkan laptopnya di nightstand dan menyingkirkan berkas-berkasnya. Ia menepuk-nepuk kasur di sebelahnya.

“Come here, my dear.”

Aku menghambur ke dekapan Shiwon. Napasku memburu seperti orang yang menangis, tetapi aku tidak menangis. Mataku hanya berkaca-kaca, tapi aku tidak menitikkan air mata.

Shiwon mengelus dan menepuk punggungku perlahan. Aku merasakan kehangatan menjalar ke seluruh tubuhku. Perlahan-lahan napasku menjadi teratur.

“You know, everything happens for a reason.”

Aku mengangguk-angguk.

“You know too that you can always come to lean on me.”

Aku mengangguk-angguk lagi. Kemejanya kusut karena anggukanku berulang-ulang.

Aku menghela napas panjang. Mataku mulai berair.

Mengapa aku harus takut kalah dan ingin melarikan diri? Padahal aku tidak akan pernah benar-benar terluka. Aku mungkin akan jatuh dan merasakan sakit, tetapi tidak akan lebih dari itu. Shiwon tidak akan pernah mengizinkan aku terluka. Pada akhirnya pun, aku harus selalu kembali padanya.

Jadi kenapa aku harus menyerah atas hal ini?

Shiwon menepuk-nepuk punggungku untuk meredakan isakan tanpa suaraku. Ia mengecup kepalaku.

“You know you have me.”

Aku mengangguk-angguk.

Thank God I have you.



-------------------------------------------------------
Try to guess what is Shiwon's relationship with the main character? ㅋㅋㅋ

Interrogated

Those four boys—or I should say, young men—sat in front of me. Not in the same couch, but somehow they manage to give the same tense—the tense of an interrogation.

I didn’t make any voice. I simply looked at them who stared at me with different gazes. Key shot a stern look. Jinwoon’s was concerned one. Shiwon’s was, as always, a caring gaze. Changmin’s was more like ‘what part can't you understand?’.


Being the oldest among the five, Shiwon broke the silence. “You know why we are here now, right?” he started off very slowly.


I nodded.


“I can't get it, really,” Changmin cut the intro, “which parts of that guy attracted you? His qualification doesn’t even approach the minimum of your standards!”


I sighed. “Why are all of you put so much care on this problem? I mean, it’s just I like this boy, that’s all. And I’m not someone to all of you; I’m just a common fan girl.”


“It’s not just ‘that’s all’. Well, you are a fan girl, that’s a fact, but you chose us as your models of The One. We have to make sure you choose the right one. We can't just sit back and do nothing. It’s our responsibility as the chosen ones.” Key stated. “If you mind with us interfere, you are free to pick others as your models of The One.” He added.


“Had I known you would choose him, I would have approved Rifaye years ago.” Changmin said.


“Why bring up old things? I’m over him now…” I folded up my arms.


“Although he doesn’t have a good sense of treating woman, but Rifaye sure has a bright brain. You said he participated in Science Olympiad, didn’t he? And he is the one you can rely on; he is a good leader too.” Changmin reasoned out.


"Yeah, I hear his business sense is great. Rifaye will make a good pair with you, since you are an excellent manager." Key added.


“Oh please. We know I don’t need whiz man. Someone in average intelligence and capability to treat me well will do.” I furrowed.


“I don’t mind if that guy is not smart, nevertheless I have never expected him to be that not smart until he failed on the university entrance test where many students—which I thought they were on the same level as him—succeeded.” Jinwoon made the other grin. I sighed remembering it. Yes, this time I agreed with him.


“Or you can consider Orenji. He’s not as brilliant as Rifaye, but is definitely smarter than that guy—and undeniably, has way prettier face.” Key suggested. I shook my head quickly.


“Not in a million. I heard he have had many exes now. And he is not that pretty again nowadays.” I stretched my hand.


“Having many exes doesn’t indicate he is a player.” Shiwon stated. “Look at Jaejoong hyung. He does have that number of exes; however, can you call him a player?”


I pouted. How could Shiwon compare a man like Jaejoong with someone in the vein of Orenji?


“And no one says a player can't stop being a player. You’ve known stories of players being faithful after meeting the right woman.” Jinwoon inserted in.


I started getting irk. “Who can guarantee I’m the right woman for him? And why are you promoting them again after you shoved them off the list?”


“Just trying to open up your eyes.” Changmin leaned back. “The thing that I can't deal with up until now is how could you throw all standards you made by your own away like that? You were the one who picked some qualifications of us four and made them standards of your The One.”


I mused. Changmin is always the great observer. Nothing slips his sight. Add to the list, he has tendency to say anything straight to the point and use simple yet hurtful words. “Guess I fell for him. Randomly.” I said finally. “You know that it is something out of your control. I don’t mean to be an inadequate one. I don’t mean to disobey those standards… Just before I knew, feelings have involved too deep with him…”


“But you can control your feeling from developing into love. You did that to Nazriel.” Key reminded. Ah, this boy was really becoming Changmin Jr. Shooting you with hurtful fact.


I felt my eyes started teary. “I don’t know… He is… different. He doesn’t feel intimidated with my status. He gives me proper care, not like someone from the past. He protects me well and is gentle… Like you, Shiwon.” I looked deep into Shiwon’s eyes. He drew his famous precious smile. Shiwon is a type who shows off his care and protection clear to everyone.


“He is? Well, his writings are discourteous. Have you read his blog or his social networking accounts?” Changmin pointed.


I bit my lip. I wanted to defense his image in front of these guys so badly, but the thing Changmin pointed was the thing I hate the most from him. When he is upset or bothered by something or someone, he’ll curse. The worse, he likes to post his curses up so others can read them. Reading them, one will hardly believe he is gentle. I took a deep breath. Once again, I looked deep into Shiwon’s eyes, seeking for his warm support.


“It’s not like I really want him to be The One…” I said weakly. “Moreover, he’ll leave by the end of this month. He’s moving out to the Southern.” I couldn’t hold back anymore. The first droplet dropped.


“Nothing is wrong with falling for someone.” Jinwoon’s words felt like soothing my hair. “Still, choosing The One needs serious consideration. You need to think about many aspects. Even if he passes all your standards, there’s always a chance he can't be your The One.”


As much as I wanted to refuse, Jinwoon’s saying was true. Too true until it scattered my hearts.


“You know what you have to do.” Shiwon gave his serene look.


“Nothing will change if he still remains in your head, in your heart.” Key reminded.


I looked at them with completely wet eyes. “You will help me, won’t you?”


“For sure.” Key smiled. “So will people around you.” He added.


“Your life is yet long way to go.” Changmin said. “Therefore you still have times to search for the right The One.”


Hearing their cares made my cry even louder and longer. “Thank you… for caring me this much.” I said between my sob.


I felt Shiwon’s arms encircled my body. Then Jinwoon’s hand patting my shoulder, Key’s holding mine, and Changmin smoothing my head. At this moment, I cried almost histerically.


“You have to remember that we do care about you and we do believe you, okay?” Shiwon whispered. I nodded.


“We only want the best for you. We will fight for giving you the best.” Changmin kept soothing my hair.


I buried my head deeper in Shiwon’s chest. He smiled. “Live happily, promise?” I nodded again. This time, continuously.


I could feel their figures slowly fading as I keep nodding. When they were about to disappear, I reached Shiwon’s hand. He smiled widely. “Be happy,” he said, and then they vanished completely.



Out of blue, I felt breathing was so hard. I opened my eyes slowly. The swing air from the air conditioner swing at my face. I wondered why my eyes felt so heavy. The small mirror on the cupboard reflected my self. My eyes were completely wet and swollen. As my fingertips touched the tears, a familiar miserable feeling grew in my chest. Floods of tears was about to burst, but Jinwoon’s deep voice stopped it.



Even if things were tough, I couldn't say so

Even if I was sad, I'd always smile
I'm afraid of totally collapsing if I admit I'm having a hard time right now
I'm afraid I'll want to stop what I'm doing if I admit I'm sad right now
I'm smiling now, I'm smiling from the bottom of my heart
Because I have you waiting for me, because I can show you today
I smile, I smile, and I smile


A few hours ago, I forgot to turn off my iPod.





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I wrote this quite sometime ago. Today I post my writings (fanfics, oneshots, and drabbles) in order to celebrate my and twinnie's 19th year of life :)


생일 축하해 내 쌍둥이와 나 :)

생일 축하해 내 쌍둥이와 나!
 
The 19th years of life... Wish we will always be under His loving care :) 
 
 
For you, who were born at 12 pm
and me, who was born at 6 pm

dick & nizz
 

Wednesday, March 2, 2011

... Just can't get enough

To celebrate #hongstarday and #happybirthdayjbj today.. and mine and my twinnie's and Uncle Ronnie's tomorrow :)    Let's sing a song recently played automatically and continuously in my head! An old lovely song from the one and only, 동방신기.


CRAZY LOVE



평소엔 안 그러던 내 마음 한구석
심장 없는 로봇처럼 가만히 죽은 척
그녈 가슴에 두고
I've been Hurting So much
모두 반대하는 그녀는 나의 No1

그게 나도 이런 날 몰라
몇 천 번이고 맘을 고쳐봐도 안되요
Baby, I know U know I want Ya
너를 향한 내 맘 다들 모르죠

그대 듣지말아요 헛된 이야기들
그 누구보다 그댈 믿어주는
난 세상을 향해 외쳐요

누가 뭐라 해도 You're my Crazy Love
미쳤다고 해도 Just can't get enough
이런 나의 맘을 그댄 알아주겠죠
Baby My Heart Beats for U

사람들은 자주 계산하지
마치 사고파는 물건같이
뭔가 더 원하지
역 시 더 나은 L O V E를 기대하며 살지
하지만 그건 내가 아니지

그게 나도 이런 내가 싫어
몇 만번이고 고갤 돌려봐도 안돼 Yo
I know U know I want Ya
너 없이 안되는 날 받아줘

아름다운 것들은 영원하지 않죠
언제까지나 나를 믿어주는
넌 그 무엇보다 소중해

누가 뭐라 해도 You're my Crazy Love
미쳤다고 해도 Just can't get enough
이런 나의 맘을 그댄 알아주겠죠
Baby My Heart Beats for U

사랑한게 죈가요 멈출 수가 없어요
아무도 이해할 수 없어도

그 댈 사랑해요 BABY I LOVE U
그댈 힘들게 해 맘이 아파요
이런 나의 맘을
아무도 몰라줘도 그대면 돼

누 가 뭐라 해도 You're my Crazy Love
미쳤다고 해도 Just can't get enough
이런 나의 맘을 그댄 알아주겠죠
One more time

누가 뭐라 해도 You're my Crazy Love
미쳤다 고 해도 Just can't get enough
이런 나의 맘을 그댄 알아주겠죠
Baby My Heart Beats for U

알아요 It's My Crazy Love for U


Although it wasn't like this usually,
a part of my heart feels dead like a robot,
I've put her into my heart, 
I've been hurting so much, she's my number one,
though everybody objects her

(I don't even know myself) No matter how many times I try to fix my heart, it doesn't work
(I know U know I want you) Nobody knows my feelings towards you
Dear, don't listen to those nonsense filled stories,
I, who trusts you the most in this world, is yelling out to the world

No matter what anybody says, you're my crazy love,
Though they say I'm crazy, Just can't get enough,
I hope you will acknowledge my feelings,
Baby, my heart beats for you

People usually calcuate, as if it's an item you sell and buy, 
asking themselves what they want more,
At times, I anticipate for a better love, but that's not me

(I don't like how myself like this either) No matter how many times I turn my head, it won't work, yo
(I know U know I want you) Please accept me, because I can't go on without you

Beautiful things aren't eternal,
But you're the most special for you'll believe me forever

No matter what anybody says, you're my crazy love,
Though they say I'm crazy, Just can't get enough,
I hope you will acknowledge my feelings,
Baby, my heart beats for you

Is it a sin to love (to love), I can't stop (can't stop),
Even if people can't understand me,
I just love you, baby I love you

It pains me that I make it hard for you,
Even if nobody knows how I feel, if it's you, it's fine

No matter what anybody says, you're my crazy love,
Though they say I'm crazy, Just can't get enough,
I hope you will acknowledge my feelings,
One more time

No matter what anybody says, you're my crazy love,
Though they say I'm crazy, Just can't get enough,
I hope you will acknowledge my feelings,
Baby, my heart beats for you

I know, it's my crazy love for you








May this 19th year of life brings me to a much better self.
May He keeps me in His guide as always.
May in this 19th year of life I am closer on chasing those good things.

생일 축하해 아름다운 나 :)