Thursday, March 3, 2011

Signs ch4: Can't You See My Signs?

Chapter 4: Can't You See My Signs?

After closing the café up, Jinwoon sat in front of the piano and read Agnes’ musical score for the th time. He got permission to stay up. That night he’s planning to rearrange the whole song.

He played the score, stopped, mused for a while, played the piano again, and then crossed out something on the paper. He swung his head to the rhythm as he played the piano. The times he got stuck, he tapped his fingers to the piano keys.

An hour later, Jinwoon played the whole parts he had rearranged. He tilted his head when he pressed the last key. It feels dry, he thought. The first arrangement had the feel of broken heart, but what is this? If I weren’t the arranger, even I myself wouldn’t know it’s a brokenhearted song. He sighed.

Once again, he read the chores. Agnes had written only the chorus part.

Can't breathe, it’s a mayday
Heart hurts, it’s a mayday
Time goes and flies by
Can you hear my sign?
Please look at me for one last time
I once shined but now I’m different
And I couldn’t say anything

And she said it’s about broken heart. He tapped the piano keys again. Speaking of broken heart… his mind examined himself. He was still in brokenhearted state, by the way. His love was ended before he could confess. Blame yourself for being coward all these times, said a voice in him. But couldn’t she sense my feelings towards her? Another voice countered. How could you expect her to find your feelings out while you’d been masking them oh-so-perfectly? mocked the first voice. But I did give her signs… Couldn’t she see my signs?

“That’s it!” Jinwoon exclaimed and hit the piano. Somehow spirits had filled him up and forced him to play the song in totally different notes. Sometimes he paused to write down the notes or the lyrics.

It’s me, the one who’s crying like a fool
I’m in the dark room all day and all night and it’s not alright
Why can't you understand my heart?
My heart tightens as time passes

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